I pity the fool

I could have been healed 5 times, its disheartening,. Again im unsure what to do and my elbow is somehow there the way its suppose to. I thought it would mishappen days ago. its on the verge now as I type, I think ill just do chi power, once the elbow is gone I can not chi fight, but the chi does nothing to the bones when going hard. maybe I should shape the metacarpel, my body will never recover all the way, ill be like a duck with a cut flap in his foot.I cant feel my elbow, the roof was such a good idea. this was difficult for me to understand, I should of said something because I understand the next day late. I had a dream in california. I walked into a small grocery store many pretty women were in there. Angel was working there and she spoke business to me. this other woman was there she was beautiful, she left with me and we laid together, I put my arm over her and felt peace. I think the point of the dream was I did not hear her voice. and now my shoulder is pulling. I wonder if I should pop my elbow to place so it cant spread. Is that familiar? either way im sad and broken, but Ive felt worse and this will pass