I dont mean to reflect my angry feelings. it comes from fear and uncertainty. I did this to myself I know, ill pay for it, im sorry things turned out the way they did, Im not talking to anybody, you were thinking wrist, I thought shoulder and I couldnt keep up communication wise probably because im falling apart regardless though. It felt there were ways to help me and I was n't getting it. even now its a like bleeding into my forearm. I can think better now actually because my fear wasnt in my hand but in my chi and balance. people dont understand its power and it scared me having my organs constrict and my knees slide in their joints. its blocked in my elbow which is what I wanted. My hand bone didnt have to die but  I didnt know. No one believed me about this, even Dr Tan who helped me and I have great admiration for his skill did not believe me about my wrist bone. my hand bone will be breaking soon thanks for kickin it